STRUGGLES

Hi all! I wrote this a little while back, when our family & some of our friends were under personal attack. I am finally ready to share it with you all. God has been so FAITHFUL and His hand has been moving in our lives and I want to make sure to give HIM the glory!

I am struggling! I think we all do at some point. We all struggle with something. Sometimes its a daily struggle, sometimes it is a season of struggles. Sometimes it is over the simplest of things and sometimes it over big issues. What is your struggle lately?

Well mine...seems like a lot of things these past few months. I struggle with the everyday stuff a housewife & mom deals with. You know...is the house clean enough...NOPE! When will they invent self cleaning toilets for crying out loud!  Did I spend enough time with the kids today....Nope. Surely they are creative enough to find things to do on their own. Did my Husband feel appreciated...nope! But hey, I made sure to let him know yesterday!

Here is the thing, recently I have been struggling with even bigger things....I am talking about the things that we wrestle with that are not of flesh & blood. 

Ephesians 6:12

For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.

I really believe that all Christians will deal with this. I know that if we didn't then maybe we are not in a place that scares the devil.

Why me? That is an easy answer...Christ himself had to deal with these types of struggles. I am definitely not better than Christ!

The details aren't important, I can tell you that this is not the first time we...(I am going to switch to we because my hubby & I are in this together) have ever faced these types of challenges. These are the types of things that make you second guess yourself but at the same time make you want to fight for what you know is truth.  These are the types of things that make you question why its even happening, what is the purpose, who is to gain from it & what are they really gaining? A great answer to that last question came from a great friend & she simply said "evil doesn't need a reason." To which I replied "but I do!"  

  But do I?

 Do I need to always have the answers to evil things. Unfortunately we have to just trust. I say unfortunately because in our human nature we want all the answers. We want to know the who, what, when, where & whys of life. Do you think Job had to have an answer when he lost every Earthly thing?

Job 1:1

There was a man in the land of Uz, whose name was Job; and that man was perfect and upright, and one that feared God, and eschewed evil.

Job was perfect...not I! And yet he questioned. But in Job 13:5 Job says,

Though he slay me, yet will I trust in him: but I will maintain mine own ways before him.

I certainly am not saying my struggles are as Job's, no way. I am so thankful that we are all healthy, we have a home & all is well over all! But I look at Job's life and wonder what was it about him that even when his wife said "why don't you curse your god and die"...HE DIDN'T! How would you have handled loosing EVERYTHING? Silly as it sounds, I loose the pictures off my computer when it crashes and it seems devastating...imagine loosing all your kiddos that were in those pictures. How would you go on? I pray none of us ever has to deal with that. But job did and he still trusted God. Mine & hubby's struggles have been nil in comparison but they are ours. Yours are yours and who am I to say either are bigger than the other persons. Here is the thing....God gives us these struggles so that HIS glory will be made known. Remember the story of Joseph & the pit! His own brothers tried to destroy him. But Joseph was faithful to God and when his brother's realized it was him, they fell before him in fear. He then told them

 Genesis 50:20

 But as for you, ye thought evil against me; but God meant it unto good

God uses our struggles to make us stronger. He uses them to make us more reliant on Him. He uses them so that others will look at us and know the God in whom we serve is Faithful! Life is not easy and God never promised us it would be....He actually says to take up the cross....what? That is not easy in my book.

Luke 9:23

And he said to them all, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow me.

But we also know that in

 1Kings 8:57, it tells us

The LORD our God be with us, as he was with our fathers: let him not leave us, nor forsake us:

So what was it about Job? He was upright & he feared God!  We want to be upright & fear the Lord as well. However; sometimes we doubt and question but you see... through everything lately God has not forsaken us. He has been there all along. Leading the battle. It has also been one of the most amazing times of our lives. I have told those who have been praying for us, that it has been amazing to just sit back & watch God work. You see most of those people who have said they were praying...didn't even know what was going on, I had not told them. The Holy Spirit lead them to pray. He does such amazing things.

 So sometimes He uses our struggles to remind US that HE LOVES US, HE WILL BE WITH US, HE WILL NOT FORSAKE US and HE IS FAITHFUL!

I am so thankful for Christ, for without Him I am nothing!

Frustrated but Real!

UGHHHHH! That is my "word" for today! It has been a day where NOTHING that I had planned on doing got done! NOTHING!!! I cleaned up several spills, tried to get the homeschooling done but the printer refused to do its job, I didn't get the bathrooms done,  I still need to put my laundry away, I failed at making a healthy dinner, and the list goes on. But, I did color with my little two, sat on the porch swing with the kiddos, read some lines of my daughter's play with her, cuddled with my sweet girl, laughed with my oldest son, chatted with my hubby, watched my little two climb in a tree to do their school work (got pics too), served hot dogs for dinner (kids & hubby love em), sat down and watched little videos my kids made on the ipad, and the list goes on! 
So I suppose ughh was my word for the morning. After my hubby gently reminded me that the housework can wait & the kids are trying new things & they are learning....I relaxed! I enjoyed moments with my kiddos. Moments that I wont get again.
Here is the thing. I love blogs! I enjoy reading about all the ways other moms & wives do life. Some are so scheduled and organized. I think to myself how wonderful life would be if I could be that way. Others have beautiful school rooms that I would just LOVE to have. Some bloggers have amazing food & recipes. If only I could cook gourmet meals like those....and if only my family would eat them! There are those bloggers who seem to have spotless homes. Ok if you were to walk in my home right now you would be amazed...not in a good way! I have 4 kids home with me all day! Not a museum here...a real home....lived in! Then there are the bloggers who have such convicting posts that they make me feel like I am the farthest thing from a "Super Christian".
All of these bloggers are wonderful. I really enjoy reading their work. I enjoy getting a peek into their world. BUT...I am me. God created me unique. Just like He did them. Sometimes I am more organized. Sometimes my house is spotless (if only for a moment). There are days that I make awesome healthy meals that get devoured. But those things do not always happen on the same day! That is my real word! Frustrating sometimes but definitely REAL and WONDERFUL.
Its ok that I am not perfect. No one is! But what is perfect is that I get to spend my days enjoying the moments! The dust & dishes will be there later, but my children will not be in my home forever. I have to remember to stop & spend those moments with them and in the end...I did get the kitchen cleaned & the dishes done. Not in my time but in time! 
And on the point of not getting anything done.....those cute pics I got of the kids doing their school work in the tree...the computer is refusing to let me load them on here! SO....tomorrow is a new day & God's mercies are new every morning. I look forward to seeing what He has in store, even if it is not what I have planned!